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How to handle this anxiety and stop incest role playing?

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I am 24 years old.  I have problem of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) and social anxiety right from my childhood which has manifested in anxiety disorder and depression now.

I don't want to post such kind of question here but this is my last resort as I am feeling like hell. I am turned on by incest porn but would never like to even think about my family members in this way. Recently I and my girlfriend tried some new things in role play, where we played rhe role of mother and son but I never ever fantasized about my mom.

Only erotic chat arouses me just like reading a sex story and we used dirty words or slangs for that role play but didn't take name of anybody or even think about them. After that I felt like that It was very gross to do that. But i have done this a couple of times.Lastly I want to get out of this hell. I seriously don't want to read these kind of stuff. I have controlled myself for a couple of months but then I gave in to that. My anxiety has become extreme by thinking that I am very bad. I lost my mother 5 years back.

How to handle all these issues. Please help me.

 

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